When I was seventeen years old my mom brought home a man that she met at a country western dance. I was sitting at the kitchen table doing my homework when he walked up and slapped me on the side of the head as he sarcastically said, âIs the good little school girl doing her homework?â I could smell the alcohol on his breath and a rage rose up in me as I grabbed the chair I was sitting in and struck him on the back as he walked away. He aggressively turned toward me as my mother stepped in between us. It was at that moment she made a statement that cut me to the core and deeply wounded my soul. She said, âIf you donât like it around here you can leave!â I was crushed my own mother would choose this man that she had just met over her own daughter. That night I packed my clothes and left, carrying the bitter pain with me for many years.
As a result of the wound I suffered from my mother I put up a wall to protect my tender heart from any further pain. What I didnât realize was that wall also kept me from receiving Godâs healing love. I heard this powerful statement that there are only two important things in the world – love and forgiveness. We can’t have love without forgiveness and we can’t have forgiveness without love.  So where does this love come from? It originates from God himself because he is love. I donât know about you but I had no grid for love or truth for that matter so I searched for it in all the wrong places. When I encountered this God kind of love I knew in that moment that I needed his forgiveness. I am so grateful that he did not look at my life and say, âYouâre too far gone!â No, to my surprise he reached his arms of love toward my wayward soul and embraced me like a loving father.
That connection with my Heavenly Father filled a void that could never be met by anyone or anything in this world. As a result of receiving Godâs love I was able to forgive my mother and today we celebrated her 80th birthday together! I love the way God takes our broken lives and makes something absolutely beautiful. If there is someone you need to forgive go ahead and receive Godâs love so you, too, can experience the joy of forgiveness. (This story is an excerpt from the chapter on Forgiveness in the book, Bright Lights, Dark Places)
